Thank you, Barack. It was so kind of you to say that...

Fret, not, fellow Americans, Barack Obama likes us. In the end, he thinks the American people are "basically decent and sound people."

And, just because you are a "typical white person," who drives the wrong car, eats too much food, keeps your home too warm, "clings to your guns and religion," and may listen to the "wrong" radio and TV shows. Despite the fact that we have an "antipathy to people who aren't like (us)," and an "anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment...", Obama thinks we are OK.

Thanks, Barack. It's nice to hear that you like us, right now, you like us.

This came as a surprise, as it was just a few months ago, that Barack told the German people, we are an imperfect, flawed nation.

He actually didn't like us -- before he did like us...

Unlike that mean old McCain, who has the audacity to say we are the "strength of our economy": "No one can match an American worker. Our workers sell more goods to more markets than any other on Earth. Our workers have always been the strength of our economy, and they remain the strength of our economy today." The nerve of that man!

He even had the gall to refer to the hardworking men and women of Ohio. Who does this guy think he is? Such pandering!

As for Obama, doesn't it feel good that someone who may be president has a list of "wrong" radio and TV programs? Is that anything like Nixon's enemies list?

But, if we are really lucky, Obama will help to protect us from those "wrong" programs.

Have no fear, dear reader, if Barack wins, the rest of the world will like us once again. Look at all the Germans that turned out to hear him speak; and there was that British comedian(?) at the MTV video awards show who urged us to vote for Barack to make "the rest of the world" happy. I know that I am concerned about casting a vote to curry European approval; I care deeply who the Europeans want us to elect. Why, how about just letting Europens elect our presidents from now on?

If Obama wins, the world will follow. Look, he hasn't even won the thing, and yet six Brazillian politicians have changed their name to Barack Obama. I wonder if they will change it back after the real Obama loses.

It just keeps getting stupider.

I guess we are just not as enlightened as he. While we want to keep our 5-year old ignorant of sexual issues, Barack Obama wants our schools to teach sex education to kindergarteners, because "it is the right thing to do." In fact, he worked to change the law in Illinois to institute HIV education for 5-year-olds. I guess I am just not enlightened enough to see the importance of teaching about HIV to kids who don't know what sex is. Maybe I just get "confused sometimes."

But, He will save us, says wife Michelle; Barack will "not let us go back to our lives an usual: uninvolved and uninformed." And He will fix our souls, because as we all know our souls "are broken."

Barack, I want so much for you to like us. Towards that end, I have to apologize that you are so "embarrased" because of our inability to speak a foreign language, unlike your more esteemed European friends.

Truth be told, America, Obama doesn't much like us, and he doesn't harbor much fancy for the country he wants to run, either. Unless, of course, you can afford to pay $28,500 to dine with him.







Watch His Eminence grace us with his approval. (It comes way at the end)